Feeling “at home”

I recently returned from my first ever visit to the Middle East. For the past five years my family and I have been a part of the Guild Training Network and have immersed ourselves in an Arab Muslim ethnic community in the greater Los Angeles area. As we have been seeking to incarnate the Good News and catalyze a Jesus movement from within the community, we have eagerly sought to learn from and understand the worldview of our neighbors. We have enjoyed hundreds of traditional Arab meals, celebrated dozens of significant cultural and religious events, and spent hours in meaningful (and often seemingly meaningless) conversations. We’ve learned a lot along the way…and have been changed for the better.

 

As I was recently in Jordan on my first trip to the region, I was struck by how natural and normal the environment felt. I almost felt at home. I did not feel the the typical initial “culture shock” that I have felt before traveling to other countries like Brazil, Peru and Mexico. I was not weirded out by men greeting each other with extended kisses on the cheeks, and it felt normal to see the majority of women covered with hijabs and avoiding the glances of men as I walked the streets.

 

I truly believe these past five years of living among and engaging the Arab Muslim community where we live is one of the biggest reasons for my feeling “at home” among a very foreign and drastically different culture than my own. The training and mentoring we’ve received as part of the Guild Training Network has definitely impacted the way we see the world and the way we are able to adjust to new cultures and places. And for this I am very grateful!

Multigenerational Family Communities, Part 2

Multigenerational Family Community

(In my last post, Multigenerational Family Communities, we discussed the major theme of multigenerational families in Scripture and its great importance to the Kingdom of God. I’ll build on that post here.)

Six years ago my wife and I packed up our bags and moved from England to Southern California, where we have never lived, to join both our children in their families and their four children to learn how to build the Kingdom through multi-generational family. The early part of the journey has proved to be difficult, with one of the blessings being that my daughter and her husband have moved in with us with their first child (our fourth grandchild). Continue reading “Multigenerational Family Communities, Part 2”

Multigenerational Family Communities

Multigenerational Family Community

Perhaps because of my broken family, God’s familial nature and plan spoke strongly to me as I began to follow Him in the 1970’s. I was captivated by the Genesis story where God pursues mankind through families, from Adam and Eve, through Noah, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, and my favorite, Joseph. I was impressed early by God’s declaration to Abraham that “in you all the families of the earth will be blessed” (Genesis 12:3, NASB). Through the rest of the Old Testament and into the New, God pursues mankind through families. In Ephesians 3:15 Paul speaks of God as the Father of Mankind, and “through Him every family in heaven and earth derives its name” (food for more thought on the heavenly families!). Family is not some construct that man designed. Earthly family reflects the very image of God’s heavenly family! Continue reading “Multigenerational Family Communities”

How to Develop a Flourishing Relationship

It goes without saying that each of us develop issues in our relationships. Sadly, however, consider how often we seek out others’ advice or answers and find no good results, or give up on relationships altogether when things get tough. Search no farther! God’s Word is practical, and he provides us many concrete ways to help us experience restoration and eventually flourishing!

Here are a few Biblically-based practices (taken from Dick Scoggin’s “Becoming One” series) that are solid foundations for building a healthy relationship.

  • Develop intimacy with the Lord. Our basis of good communication comes from an overflow of our relationship with Christ (1 John 1:3).
  • Listening to each other (Proverbs 18:13)
  • Openness and honesty (Ephesians 4:25)
  • An understanding attitude (1 Peter 3:7)
  • Getting beyond yourself to understand the other person (Philippians 2:1-4, Ephesians 4:1-3)
  • Practicing self-control (Ephesians 4:26-27)
  • Careful selection of words and tone of voice (Ephesians 4:29, Proverbs 12:18)
  • Patience (Ephesians 4:31-32)

Healthy relationships also require vulnerability. The more you are willing to be honest and even reveal your weaknesses and insecurities, the more your relationship will get stronger. Though it is easier to retreat and allow your fears of criticism or judgment from the other to keep your from being vulnerable, your relationships will lack depth. With the guidance and healing from the Holy Spirit, you can learn to let go of the fear and self-protection, and learn to let your emotional guard down.

Healthy relationships require forgiveness. In Matthew 18:21-35, Jesus reminds us of the of God’s unfathomable, amazing forgiveness, and in turn he asks us to do the same for others. As many of us have experienced, when trust is lost, it is nearly impossible for a friendship or relationship to grow and deepen. On the other hand, genuine repentance and choosing to offer a humble apology, as well as a response of accepting it, are essential to allowing a relationship to be restored after a fall-out.

If you feel that you are at an impasse in a relationship, fight hard to restore it. Trying these helpful practices may lead to breakthrough!

Exploring your Calling, Part 2: Preparing Your Heart for Marriage

Reorienting Your Life Around Your Calling

When God calls you to something, there is no doubt that that this call will transform your life. This is no more true than in the area of being called to be married or single. If you are called to be married, your life will be irrevocably changed by the partner you choose. If you are called to be single, you will need to be part of a wider community, and that community will irrevocably change your life. We must each reorient our lives around our calling, not try to fit our calling into our life with as few changes as possible.  Any time God issues a call, a person’s life will have to radically adjust. There are plenty of biblical examples such as Jonah, Isaiah, Jeremiah and many others.

If you feel called to get married, here are some points to consider as you pursue that calling: Continue reading “Exploring your Calling, Part 2: Preparing Your Heart for Marriage”

Exploring your Calling, Part 1: Marriage or Singleness?

Expanding the Definition of Calling

Many Christians think of “calling” as what God wants them to do for their career or ministry. They may spend years pursuing degrees and training to following the direction they feel God is guiding them to; at the same time, they neglect to devote time and energies to pursuing whether or not God has called them to get married.

In Paul’s first letter to the Corinthian church, he spends a great deal of time focusing on relationships between men and women. In 1 Corinthians 7:17, he defines calling in regards to marriage or singleness: “Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him. This is my rule in all the churches” (ESV).    Continue reading “Exploring your Calling, Part 1: Marriage or Singleness?”